Monday, June 22, 2009

Father's Day Sadness

Father’s Day is always a highlight for me. I am overwhelmed with the reality that God is so gracious as to allow me to shepherd the hearts of five precious souls. And to think that they actually enjoy being my kids is something that never ceases to amaze me. I am sure I’m not the only father that feels this way.

But as wonderful as my Father’s Day was on yesterday, it was sprinkled with a bit of sadness. Interestingly, the sadness snuck up on me as I was driving with my kids in route to pick up my father for an afternoon of pizza and bowling. The cause of my sadness was the visible silence that spoke so clearly of the state of fatherhood, particularly in the African-American community.

As I drove down Crenshaw Blvd. I became acutely aware of the absence of any corner vendors selling gifts for fathers. Why did that make me sad? Because just a month ago that same stretch of road was strewn with hundreds of vendors selling various gifts for Mother’s Day, and folks were crowded around them like bees on honey. But nothing for fathers! Absolutely nothing! Now, granted there are far more gifts that are appropriate for mothers; but no vendors at all? Not even someone selling ties, hats or socks. Surely some of us fathers like coffee mugs and T-shirts that say #1 Dad. But nothing! And that made me sad.

But it made me sad at a deeper level – a level that pains me to talk about. For what I saw, or did not see, was simply a metaphor in my mind for the horrid state of fatherhood in my community. It said to me that fathers don’t really matter. The absence of the vendors on the corner signified to me the absence of fathers in the home. To our own demise, we have learned how to live without fathers, which is not living at all. For God designed the home to have a head, and that head is the father (Eph. 6:4). But if the father is not there, with all do respect to God-fearing praying mothers, that family is headless. And headless things can’t survive for long, if at all.

So my Father’s Day was good, but it reminded me of the great need of the gospel of Jesus Christ for my community, particularly in the area of family life. For only Jesus Christ can “restore the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of the children to their fathers” (Mal. 3:6). I pray that if the Lord tarries and I live to see another Father’s Day that Crenshaw Blvd. will be filled with corner vendors selling their goods in recognition of the essential nature and role of fathers.